Being eaten by squirrels was not part of my plan.

The apocalypse never came.

Not in lightning and thunder and volcanic eruptions.

The zombie takeover didn't happen in massive hordes within a few days or weeks as depicted on TV.
It came insidiously, like a thief who has planned well for the burglary of a lifetime.
They weren't shuffling, shambling zombies with no brains.
But I'm getting ahead of myself. It all started one morning before work. Me getting my teen to do his part, my teen pretending to argue, you know, a normal day. A day like any other day, or so I thought...